Monthly Archives: July 2013

The Power of Positive Thinking

What favorite quote do you use when you feel let down, that nothing can’t be accomplished? Is there something in particular you look at to set your mind to think positive? The reason I ask is because I think we should all stick to a quote we can look to motivate and carry ourselves up again. I want to write this post especially for a friend that hasn’t learned how big positive thinking is.

This came about on a good evening where I was minding my own business when all of a sudden she mails me a message asking for resources of websites she could look at for job postings.

I gave her a listing and she told me she was scared of going to work for the first time, and didn’t know if she could handle the pressure of both school and work. I told her it doesn’t seem quite scary of going to school and having a job at the same time, but after you throw yourself in, you won’t know how it feels until you’re in it.

Later she complained she wasn’t confident enough and started putting herself as a let down. I told her no that’s the incorrect way to think. Anyone can be confident it’s not hard at all, it all takes practice. Her sister is a very well prepared and confident person but what I saw in her was that she is afraid of asking for help.

She later told me that it’s easier to say it then to do it. But what’s the problem here?

Of course it’s easy to say it, but it’s also easy to make it difficult. This is something that I’ve learned from the great Jim Rohn. It’s a habit that we create to make it easy for not doing anything.

When we let ourselves down and get stuck there, it’s one of the worst things we as humans can do. Our mind plays a very powerful role, that it affects how we choose to live our lives everyday.

Several things I’ve learned is that we should try having our minds set up high. Meaning we should always tend to keep ourselves positive. When you are positive and you get your mind influenced, you tend to do better things you thought couldn’t be possible.

For example if we lack in confidence, we should foremost focus on what is it that I’m good at in my social skills. If you’re good at listening, then obviously asking for help isn’t a problem. But again, what if asking for help seems terrifying? The only thing I have to say is that no man becomes successful in an island. It’s a great quote I heard from Og Mandino.

We all need help at some point in our lives and if we want to reach a certain skill or goal, we have to look at others for guidance resulting in a much higher percent success rate compared to going at it alone.

Again going back to the positive thinking of the mind, it can become very powerful and controlling. If we picture something we want, say a job for instance. If we focus on a particular job we want in our mind, it won’t be too long before we acquire it.

The reason being is because we then start to focus on the skills that is involved in that position, and soon instead of asking why can’t I have this job, you’ll be asking how can I get it? Who should I look for? What skills are necessary and how do I get started? You’ll put yourself even more closer to getting to where you want to get by preparing instead of sitting somewhere wishing for it.

Today’s post is something I wanted to discuss about to help a friend in need that hopefully now becomes motivated to start. By concluding this post I want you reader to ask yourself how has putting your mind on positive thinking helped you along the way? Has it overcome struggles? Has thinking big been a great success? If so, please feel free to share your experiences.

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Guiding Leaders: Giving the Helping Hand in Situations

As leaders, how do you give guidance to other leaders that may be stuck in a certain situation they can’t move forward? You witness them trying to come up with ways of how the problem can be handled, but as a result, he gives in and reacts to the same degree one of the members gave him.

During the weekend our church had a big event going on. Many families from out of state were going to attend and friends invited relatives to come as well. The worship band leader was assigned to decide what will be on the list to play for the public. We all came to agreement of the list, however, one particular member did not agree with what he had decided.

The playlist they had was completely different for what he had in mind. He argued that the ones for this event should be different because it was a special occasion. The music leader cooperated with him but his response did not move him to make any changes.

Getting close to the special event, the same person who didn’t agree to the playlist had gathered himself a new music group without asking the worship leader about it first. The outcome was upsetting. Everyone felt it wasn’t fair and it was rude and disrespectful. He told me he didn’t know what to do because the way he pictured playing music for this event was different than what the worship leader has assigned.

Quickly the worship leader became aware of it, and resulted in being upset and with the mood of not going any longer to the event.

I took notice and I had to act quickly, but the question is-how can I motivate another leader and come with ways for him to handle these situations without authorizing him?

I didn’t want to demonstrate that he is a leader that is weak, rather I wanted him to be aware of areas he needed improvement. As leaders, there’s always continuous need for improvements. I contacted him and discussed to him how can he work things out with that member that disagreed with him. We gathered ideas and he agreed.

I later came communicated with our member that disagreed with the worship leader. I made him aware that I knew about what was going on. Our discussion included that we had to be fair for everyone, nobody is an individual and we are all apart of a team. Next I told him if he wanted to be a leader, he has to learn how to follow first. His reaction quickly came to agreement, as I finally told him to call and discuss with the worship leader, how the separate music group can work with the existing worship group.

On that day it worked out well, there was no problems, except for some technical difficulties at the start, but overall everyone came to the same mindset.

As leaders, how has your experience been like guiding other leaders to lead? Has the outcome been positive or negative? What can you learn as you move forward to becoming a better leader?

Breaks May Cause Barriers

I woke up one morning on a weekend thinking to myself that after the whole week of studying, working and focusing on goals, I wanted to take a break. Most people enjoy taking time off when over a period of time they’ve been consistent, and l consider people should do it when they face exhaustion. I took that time to relax, clear my head and get away from what I usually do.

Heading down to the park visiting friends, it felt great and made me forget just about everything. However; after getting back into focus that following week, taking these breaks frequently I tended to feel too comfortable with it and I felt that it dragged me off course of what I was originally doing.

The problem that occurred here is that when we start to feel too comfortable, we tend to not let go and returning back to what we did before becomes difficult.

It may ruin your following week or perhaps even your month because the comfort of not doing anything starts to become a habit. Your mind is filled with distractions and it’s lost somewhere else. I think we all know how controlling habits can be, and how difficult it is changing one to another.

How do you put your focus back into that mindset you’ve been having?

One of the critical things I do is try self motivation. Finding things that bring me back into that mindset. Listening to audio, or videos in relation to what I was doing before. It’s a big help and I’m sure it can help you too.

Another method that helped being me get back to that mindset is by making a list of what I will be doing the following week; I have a small whiteboard by my bed, you may say it’s a goal setting form for the week if you wish. This helped me also because it is in physical writing and by hanging it or displaying it somewhere you can easily be reminded of what you should be doing if distractions arise.

We all love taking time off its a good thing, but when we tend to love it too much it can become a negative thing loosing consistency and carrying you somewhere else you didn’t intended it to go. What do you do when you lose interest in what you were doing before? Is that method your number one thing you do that instantly snaps you back into your focused mindset? Have you tried sharing it with others that may be in the same situation? If so, has it worked for them?

Bringing A Mentor

For some time now, I’ve began to start wanting to have a mentor. A mentor who gives you more specific guidance into the direction you want to go. A mentor who has faced the experiences, and informs you what is to come. There seems to be like there are great benefits when you bring a mentor into your life.

My father has been the great mentor in my life so far. He’s taught me so much about life, leadership and business, but now I feel that it’s appropriate to add someone else into my life to guide me even further to push me. I believe in order to go after what you want, you should also seek the help from another who’s been through that direction. You may ask why do I need one?

One of the reasons I look at it is because of further motivation. They seem to know the process clearly and hearing what they have to say will give me a much more needed boost in motivation, telling myself “now that I’ve committed to something, it has to be done.”

Secondly, because of the knowledge they contain. Some mentors are so informative that they soak your brain with all this knowledge you didn’t know existed. By taking notes and capturing their experiences I think you start to think (except for their experiences) in the mindset of their level.

There’s always that fear within us though, of being trapped and lost because we are nervous about whether if we are making the correct choices or not. We shouldn’t shy ourselves from finding further help, instead we should make it a habit to find it. That’s why I began analyzing myself that I should bring a mentor in my life, but where do we find them?

I know most speakers are such great mentors. Having a great relationship with them opens up opportunity. Business owners that I’ve spoken with have offered to give guidance as well. Looking for mentors isn’t a difficult task but finding the correct one is.

Have you included a mentor into your life to help guide you more towards the goals you want to accomplish? Has it benefited you immensely? What did you learn about having a mentor and what opportunities have you gained or created? Remember that we shouldn’t isolate ourselves; no man is on an island alone.

Goal Accomplishing: Who We Spend Our Time With

“Surround yourself with smart, dedicated people – to build something isn’t a one-man show. It’s more important to have smart people who believe in what you’re doing than really experienced people who may not share your dream.”

I think this quote has a lot to say about who we should revolve our lives around if we want to accomplish our goals. Like the saying goes, if you want to be successful, be around successful people. If you want to be positive, gather yourself around positive people. If you want to be negative, gather yourself around negative people. Determining our lifestyle depends part on who we spend most of our time with. It’s what makes us.

Perhaps our fathers have told us early in our childhood years, “I don’t want you around them.” But we didn’t listen and we had to learn the hard way why they didn’t want us revolving around them. Early in my years as a kid growing up and getting to know many people, I didn’t listen very often. I had many friends, but in today’s world the definition of a friend could be slightly different (not that I’m that old, I’m a 90’s kid. That’s not old right?).

All of us would gathered after school and plan on what we wanted to do. Sure some had bad thoughts in mind while others had positive, it was a mixed-variety. But I’ve learned the way of what negative people revolving around you can do. You start thinking the same as them and your life is so close minded. You cannot help but start to complain about one simple thing. Your mind goes into this state where it thinks of everything as no good and this is where problems start to rise and you lose hope within yourself.

I became aware of the situation and slowly but surely I started separating myself from them. Some of these friends I had to start choosing carefully; out of the many, I had to narrow it down. It’s probably a tough thing to do because I’ve grown up with them but the difference is that ones started to gain leadership knowledge while the others are still in the back seat running around without a path for goals nor are they motivated.

I only have a few great supportive friends that I’ve grown up with that are amazing. I’m grateful I still have them in my life, we all tend to discuss our issues and solve them as a team. But another problem is that they don’t have the same goals as I do. So how do you handle this situation when you want them to be close to that mindset?

I try and inform them of what I enjoy doing, what I see myself doing in the future and what my short/long term goals are. By doing this, their minds become relevant with mine so we don’t go off on topics that should be of no interest. We always have fun even when we are not in the same mindset, but at the end of the day we come to a close on discussing the best interest, and yes we’ve all gained each others trust.

It’s harsh to say, but apart from that now most of my time I’ve minimized being with those childhood friends too. The reason being because I’ve gotten to know few people who have the knowledge and habit to achieve their goals. I want to keep learning what they have to offer and listen to their experiences in dealing with obstacles. I don’t know if it could be balanced between them and everyone else, but I’m putting it with a good positive mentality and seeing what the results may bring.

What are your past experiences with the people you revolve yourself around? Do they give you a boost to stay motivated or have they distracted you from your goals and found it difficult to get back on track? Have you found a balance to spend time with both those not in the same mindset as you and those that are not?