“Surround yourself with smart, dedicated people – to build something isn’t a one-man show. It’s more important to have smart people who believe in what you’re doing than really experienced people who may not share your dream.”
I think this quote has a lot to say about who we should revolve our lives around if we want to accomplish our goals. Like the saying goes, if you want to be successful, be around successful people. If you want to be positive, gather yourself around positive people. If you want to be negative, gather yourself around negative people. Determining our lifestyle depends part on who we spend most of our time with. It’s what makes us.
Perhaps our fathers have told us early in our childhood years, “I don’t want you around them.” But we didn’t listen and we had to learn the hard way why they didn’t want us revolving around them. Early in my years as a kid growing up and getting to know many people, I didn’t listen very often. I had many friends, but in today’s world the definition of a friend could be slightly different (not that I’m that old, I’m a 90’s kid. That’s not old right?).
All of us would gathered after school and plan on what we wanted to do. Sure some had bad thoughts in mind while others had positive, it was a mixed-variety. But I’ve learned the way of what negative people revolving around you can do. You start thinking the same as them and your life is so close minded. You cannot help but start to complain about one simple thing. Your mind goes into this state where it thinks of everything as no good and this is where problems start to rise and you lose hope within yourself.
I became aware of the situation and slowly but surely I started separating myself from them. Some of these friends I had to start choosing carefully; out of the many, I had to narrow it down. It’s probably a tough thing to do because I’ve grown up with them but the difference is that ones started to gain leadership knowledge while the others are still in the back seat running around without a path for goals nor are they motivated.
I only have a few great supportive friends that I’ve grown up with that are amazing. I’m grateful I still have them in my life, we all tend to discuss our issues and solve them as a team. But another problem is that they don’t have the same goals as I do. So how do you handle this situation when you want them to be close to that mindset?
I try and inform them of what I enjoy doing, what I see myself doing in the future and what my short/long term goals are. By doing this, their minds become relevant with mine so we don’t go off on topics that should be of no interest. We always have fun even when we are not in the same mindset, but at the end of the day we come to a close on discussing the best interest, and yes we’ve all gained each others trust.
It’s harsh to say, but apart from that now most of my time I’ve minimized being with those childhood friends too. The reason being because I’ve gotten to know few people who have the knowledge and habit to achieve their goals. I want to keep learning what they have to offer and listen to their experiences in dealing with obstacles. I don’t know if it could be balanced between them and everyone else, but I’m putting it with a good positive mentality and seeing what the results may bring.
What are your past experiences with the people you revolve yourself around? Do they give you a boost to stay motivated or have they distracted you from your goals and found it difficult to get back on track? Have you found a balance to spend time with both those not in the same mindset as you and those that are not?
Kev’s Response Blog 